The Band Perry - “If I Die Young”

We start out with a close-up of lead singer Kimberly, as she and her golden locks launch into the song. (Not certain what that thing is in her hair, but I’m sure it’s important to her.) Quick shot of Kimberly floating in a worn-out canoe thing on a river, possibly deceased or just very tired, then back to the band. Now we can see her brothers, Neil and Reid, playing in the background. They also look tragic, so this is probably not the happiest of videos out there.

Cut to Neil and Reid playing their instruments in a nicely-restored house, the kind where you don’t dare touch anything or you’ll get your ass whupped, then we’re outside with Kimberly leading the way while the brothers carry that little boat. The house behind them is gorgeous, so I can’t imagine why they’d want to leave it, but they do. They march for a bit, then we have another snap of Kimberly in the boat. Singing and alive this time, so that’s good.

Short scene with a woman abusing a rose, so there must have been an incident with a thorn in her past, then back to the trio tramping along with the boat, and more of the band playing in that house. Back to the river, where the brothers load Kimberly into the boat and set her adrift. (Brothers always gang up on the sister.) Then we have a montage of Kimberly in the boat, clutching a book of poems by Tenneyson and pretending like her head isn’t uncomfortable, even though it’s jammed against the seat of the boat. But her dress is pretty.

More of the band playing, with the boys still refusing to smile or get haircuts. Then we might be having an actual happy moment, with Kimberly smiling and running along while a cute guy chases her. She’s not trying real hard, so you know she wants to get caught. Brief interlude with the band, then we see Kim and Beau gazing at one another with affection, deliciously naughty thoughts most likely filling their heads, then she’s back in the damn boat again, floating and lifeless.

Okay, people, we get it. Life can be super short. So let’s spend more time on the happy moments and less time floating down a river. Just sayin. Oh wait, maybe Kimberly heard me, because she suddenly pops to an upright position in the boat, like maybe a frog done hopped in her bloomers. Then we have quick shots of Beau and the rose-hating woman looking startled. Maybe it’s just me, but they seem a little upset that Kimberly might be alive after all. These people are just too damn gloomy.

Montage of the book floating in the water, separate images of Beau and Rose in a green room, reaching for something (the craft services table?) , floating flowers, and the brothers running through some field, possibly heading back to the river where they were mean to their sister, making her go sailing when she didn’t want to. What are they going to discover?

We’ll have to find out a bit later, since we cut to all the band members singing and playing back in that house, where somebody likes a really vibrant color scheme. (And insists on putting an odd grey square in front of some of the windows. Does this mean something? Are there wicked things outside the windows that we shouldn’t see? Southern people have too many secrets.)

Oh, look, there’s Kimberly and her brothers trudging across the lawn of the house, while Rose is standing at the door and smiling. Rose rushes out to greet them, along with Beau, who comes running from wherever it is that Beaus go when no one is requiring any chasing. Everybody is now very happy that she didn’t die.

Then why the hell did they put her in the boat to begin with? Is this what happens when people eat grits all the time? There’s a mandatory airing-out period?

We may never know. The song winds down with a few more random shots, then we close with a final image of one of Tenneyson’s poems, “The Lady of Shalott”. Really? If memory serves, I think I tried reading that once, some enforced-learning experiment in junior high, and it involved some mess with a woman being cursed and wallering around in a boat until she expired, unsatisfied and most likely damp.

I’m thinking Kimberly should just stay out of the library. You?


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