Wednesday, December 2, 2009

Pitbull - "I Know You Want Me (Calle Ocho)"

Okay, this IS Pitbull, after all, so you know this is going to be a series of hot women tripping over themselves to get to him, but we’ll try to find the artistic quality in it all, okay? Perhaps we can find the inner beauty and personal motivation for each of these lovely ladies. Let’s try that angle.

First we have a woman in a green and gold cheerleader outfit-thingy with yellow high heels. She’s apparently proud of Brasil and she wants to dance about her patriotism. This tribute includes running her fingers through her long hair and making seductive faces.

Insert Pitbull showing that he can count, looking all gangsta.

The cheerleader is back and she’s making out with the Brazilian flag. She loves her country.

Then we have another woman in what appears to be a black-leather airline pilot uniform. Her dance seems to indicate that when she grows up, she would like to help people fly around the world to see their loved ones. And she can count as well!

There are brief glimpses of a woman in some black spandex clingy outfit. We don’t really see enough of her to fully understand her aspirations in life, but she can wiggle her hips and pout her lips. I’m thinking there are a few careers where she can utilize those talents, so I’m sure she’ll be fine.

We also get a few shots of a woman in what I believe is called a “baby doll” dress. It probably has a fancier name. She doesn’t seem really interested in being in this video, not smiling or anything. She’s possibly been assigned the “hard to get” role, but she just looks bored.

Oh, look, they just did a tribute to the “Brady Bunch” with the hot women stacked in boxes like the opening of the TV show. That’s cute.

Then we have more of Pitbull acting street, counting, messing with a video camera, and allowing the hot women to touch him in suggestive ways while he stands there and looks disinterested.

Now we have a montage of so many women, I can’t even begin to profile them. They are mostly posing seductively in various states of undress, and making sure we understand that they have ample breasts. Duly noted.

Then there’s a woman in what I believe is a tinfoil two-piece bathing suit. She seems to be proud of several things. She can move her hips while disappearing off the top of the video, she has a tattoo leading into her butt crack, and she is able to face different directions and still maintain her balance.

And now we have biker chicks who really love their big machines. They happy to be ridin', yes they are.

Several scenes are beautifully done to help us understand that Pitbull greatly enjoys three-way sexual encounters. (With women, of course. There’s not another man in this entire video, just tons of busty women that could probably raise the Titanic with all the hydraulics they’ve got going on.)

Warning: Right about two and a half minutes in, a giant breast pokes in from the right side of the screen. It’s somewhat alarming and unexpected, so I thought I’d warn you.

More counting and confirmations that three-ways with women are greatly desired by bilingual rappers who shave their heads.

Wow, that one girl is REALLY oiled up. I hope she understands that she needs to stay away from open flames.

And the song fades away with more dancing, more women realizing their dreams, more limited counting, (Does anyone in this video realize that there are numbers higher than four? Do they have dances that are appropriate for those numbers as well?), and tons of buoyant anatomy saluting the manliness of Pitbull.

But really, folks, if you were just looking for an instructional video to teach your children the joys of counting, stick with Sesame Street. They’ll be better off.

Now, if I can just get that annoying “blah blah blah blah-blah PING” noise out of my head…

Click Here to Watch the Video on YouTube.

No comments:

Post a Comment


Related Posts Plugin for WordPress, Blogger...