Pink - “Sober”

  We start out in what is apparently a European city of some kind, with the weather all gloomy, images of violent statues and some fool ringing a church bell when people are trying to sleep. Cut to a possible hotel room, where a creepy video briefly plays on an old-fashioned TV set, then we spy Pink lying on the bed in her underwear and looking very depressed about lying on the bed in her underwear.

  Then we have Pink sitting on a blue couch that would look great in my den, with Pink still looking depressed but at least managing to do a Jean Harlow tribute with her hair. She starts warbling the song, and we are treated to flashback scenes of Pink and her drunken companions having motor-skill issues and smiling a lot. She’s wearing another set of underwear, so that might be one of the major themes of the video. Then we realize that Singing-Narrator Pink is wondering through these scenes of debauchery and limited clothing, watching Party-Girl Pink whoop it up and spill beverages.

  It seems that Narrator Pink, although chic and smartly-dressed, is not very impressed with her alter ego bellowing too loudly, knocking things over, and retching into a toilet. But Narrator Pink is still supportive of her wild-ass alter, holding her hair while she urps and writing checks to cover damages. Meanwhile, another Pink is wearing yet another set of undergarments, singing bits of the song in a room where we appear to have some faulty wiring with the lighting.

  We zip back to the original Bedroom Pink, where she and her fishnet stockings receive a call from… I believe it’s Retching Pink, although I’m distracted by some amazingly-long fingernails painted silver. In any case, Bedroom Pink is not thrilled with this attempt at communication, so she throws the phone down and sings some more of the song. This triggers a sequence of disturbing scenes in an all-white room where two women appearing to be sharing the same head, even though you can’t really SEE the head. But at least they are both wearing matching sets of designer shoes, which always makes things better.

  While Narrator Pink sings some more on the blue couch that really should belong to me, we have more goings on in that white room, a place that I never want to visit, even if it means I get to meet Pink, or at least one of her. I’m assuming this room is symbolic of Pink’s competing personalities, those that want to be sweet and responsible, and those that want to drink vats of alcohol and sleep with entire football teams. Whatever the case, everybody in that room has had too much caffeine and somebody should probably do something about that.

  Now we’re focusing on a new Pink, one that likes to wear a white wig along with her poofy dress and Xena leather wrist guards. She’s singing and wallering around in that White Room that I don’t care for, while the rest of the personalities have gone on break or been temporarily deported. Oh wait, maybe I lied, because White-Wig Pink starts tripping out and we suddenly have multiples of THAT Pink doing contortionist acrobatics and showing us the ruffles under her skirt. Poor thing. How does she keep track of all these issues?

  Back to Sparkly-Panty Pink in the electrical-hazard room, so she can narrate more of the story while we get glimpses of Responsible Pink walking through the trashed-out rooms where one of the Naughty Pinks has let things spin out of control. Then we cut to a creepy forest, where new Black-Veiled Pink likes to raise her arms while she sings and a red light flitters among the trees, casting the images of her various personalities on random trees. It’s actually a very nice allegorical set piece, but I keep expecting the Headless Horseman to suddenly ride through and cause issues.

  And then we get to the kicker scene of the whole video, where two of the Pinks hop on that hotel bed and go at it, ripping off their already limited clothing and straddling things. I must say that it’s very erotic and steamy (the lip-biting bit is crazy sexy), even though you don’t actually SEE anything, but I’m not really sure what Pink is trying to say here. Split-personalities turn her on? She’s trying out for “The L Word” and wants to show her acting range? There was something in the water?

  We roll into a montage of what I think is Sparkly-Panty Pink, with her image superimposed on statues about the city while a string quartet plays and bits of other Pinks flash across the screen. The we get shots of White-Wig Pink being very bitter and clawing at the walls of the White Room. (Maybe she’s trying to find the designer that thought it was important she look like Little Bo Peep on Acid in this scene.)

  And we have another montage of Party Pink swilling hooch, Black-Veiled Pink crawling around on the forest floor, and lots of Pink Groupies staggering around and waiting for Pink to pick up the tab for their excess and pretend friendships. (Oh, and some more bump-and-grind on the black silk sheets in the Hotel of Self-Love and Delusion. Wait, are they are at a Trump Tower?)

  The madness swirls for a bit, then things wind down as we eventually get back to Reflective Pink on my blue sofa, where she ponders how to make positive changes in her life, what she can do to repair past indiscretions, and what should be the next single from her latest album…

Click Here to Watch the Video on YouTube.