Okay, then. Apparently the script for this video simply said: “Two people walk toward each other while they sing. Fade to black.” Because that’s all that happens in this thing. Seriously. But I’ll give it a try…
We start out with a long shot of Brad walking along in one of those wide-open, really-flat, desert places where you normally see people trying to break the sound barrier while driving a car and such. (Hopefully, those people won’t be here on this particular day, or Brad could have a surprise issue.) The camera zooms in so we can see he’s wearing his trademark worn-out jeans and carrying his guitar, so he probably didn’t have to take any acting classes for this part of the video.
Then the camera zooms way back out, not sure why, maybe so we can confirm that, yep, he’s out in the middle of nowhere. Cut to just the lower half of a woman walking along in the same dried-out place, wearing a billowing dress and strappy shoes with odd metal bits. We’re pretty sure it’s Carrie, because she sings on this song and all, but for some reason the director wants her to be a mystery woman for now. Fine. I’ll play along. Who could it be?
Zip back over to Brad as he starts the vocals of the song, still walking. We’ve all seen people walk before, so the camera tries out various angles to make it seem more exciting, but really, he’s just walking. We also get quick shots of the Mystery Half-Woman still walking as well, with her dress continuing to billow in the really strong wind. Half-Woman may have thought the dress was really cute when she put it on, but you know she’s hating that damn wind right about now.
Brad sings a little more, then it’s time for Carrie’s part, and we finally get a full shot of her. She’s just walking along, of course, but at least we can see her face as she grits her teeth and struggles against the wind. On the upside, at least she’s getting a free sand facial, and those things can get really expensive in the finer salons.
Carrie also sings for a bit, messing with her hair in what she hopes looks like a sultry manner, but you know she’s just trying to keep it out of her face, cursing the idiot that came up with the idea of this nature trek video. So now we start bouncing back and forth between the two as they sing their parts. And walk. Every once in a while we get a long shot so we can check the progress of their eventual meeting in the desert, but other than that, it’s just the walking.
This goes on for a very long time.
We do learn that Brad is from the minimalist school of acting, just singing and walking with his hands at his sides, no real facial expressions whatsoever. Carrie, on the other hand, clearly went to a different school, waving her hands all over the place and scrunching up her face to show the emotional pain of the song. She’s also walking in a strange way, sort of criss-crossing her feet with every step. But that part may not have anything to do with acting, and might just be an issue from having ridden too many horses in Oklahoma.
We do finally get to a part where Brad plays his electric guitar (despite the lack of things like an outlet to actually plug the thing into), which is not exactly earth-shattering, but at least it’s something different. Carrie compensates for not having an instrument by touching her face in an anguished way and running her fingers through her hair in a sexy but parched manner.
Finally, after decades, they meet in the middle. But instead of dancing or slapping each other or doing anything exciting and fun, they just stand there and keep singing. Granted, we’re now in close-up and can better study Brad’s semi-scowl and Carrie’s irritatingly flawless skin, but you’d think there would have been a better payout after all that walking. Oh well.
So they just sing, with Brad also playing his guitar while continuing to not show any emotion, and Carrie is waving her hands like she’s directing traffic yet managing to keep her golden locks relatively in place despite wind blowing strongly enough that you fully expect that mean woman on the bicycle from The Wizard of Oz to go flying by.
We get to the end of the song, with both of them done wailing about their heartache and Carrie succeeding in not letting the wind expose her womanly bits, although it gets dangerously close a few times. Then they go walking off into the sunset together.
And I would imagine that Carrie marched right back to her trailer, called up her manager, and demanded that a “no more wind” clause be added to her contract…
Click Here to Watch the Video on YouTube.
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