Tuesday, August 9, 2011

Taylor Swift - “Back To December”

We start with some guy trudging out of the woods in some small town. He’s bundled up and there’s snow on the ground, so we’ll have to assume it’s December, just like the title. He looks kind of sad, but that might be because the director decided to shoot somewhere cold instead of the Bahamas where all the cool rappers make videos. Cut to Taylor, wearing shabby chic clothing in what might be her house, also looking sad, so I’m guessing we won’t be seeing any dance routines any time soon.

Taylor warbles for a bit, glancing around her house like she’s really sad about her decorating choices, then we cut back to the guy (let’s call him Joe Dean, just because) walking along a street, still with the sadness. Back to Taylor, sitting on her bed and still sad. Back to Joe Dean, with a close-up of his eyes, still sad. Back to Taylor… well, at this point it’s very clear that neither of them are very happy or have bothered to wash their hair lately.

Now Joe Dean is sitting in the bleachers at a football field. We should probably tell him that there’s not an actual game going on, but he’s hunched over like he ate some bad nachos from the concession stand and he probably needs some alone time. Oh look, Taylor is hunched over in her bedroom as well. This must be one of those towns where you really shouldn’t eat anything.

Then Joe Dean is on the move again, trudging along in the snow in that meandering way that misunderstood boys have, then he’s back in the bleachers, trying to get warm. (At this point we have to assume that the local school system is not really preparing its students well, if they don’t understand about going inside when its cold.) Then he hops up and heads across an empty baseball field, where there still aren’t any games being played. I’m afraid life is going to be very difficult and confusing for Joe Dean.

Meanwhile, Taylor is still shuffling about her house, singing and all, but never putting on some shoes or finding a better sweater to wear. She decides to take a bath, but this doesn’t really help much, probably because she forgets to take off her support garments before doing so. Then it starts to snow inside her house. This is the part where I would start to question the wisdom of remaining in that house, but Taylor doesn’t seem to mind the snowfall and keeps singing.

Joe Dean is walking around in the snow again, but I’m starting to not care about his activities, since he’s not managed to go anywhere interesting. At least Taylor has more things to do, like staring out windows and bathing, even if the weather is jacked up in her house. As if to prove her versatility, Taylor picks up a tablet and starts scribbling something. Joe Dean keeps just walking. To nowhere. See? Who would you pick to follow? That’s what I thought.

I think the camera man agrees with us, because we spend a long series of shots with just Taylor, as she wanders around her house, fiddling with water glasses and ignoring the indoor snowstorm. (The snow is piling up on things like furniture and fireplace mantles, so it’s kind of hard for folks to ignore, but Taylor is a professional, having been on the CMA’s a hundred times and all.)

There’s a bit where she sinks lower in her bathtub, probably not a good sign, but she seems to be staring at a snow-dusted stuffed bunny nearby, so we know she’ll probably be just fine since bunnies like to save people and be cute. Then we see Taylor back on her bed, scribbling on her pad and wearing that oversized sweater from The Gap (available in a rainbow of colors!) so the bunny apparently did it’s job and Taylor will be able to release more singles.

Joe Dean, of course, is still just walking around and looking displeased with everything.

Long montage of Taylor getting a little angsty about her sweater sleeves being too long (honey, just roll them up, I think the snow everywhere is a bigger issue), then she seems to have an issue with being able to keep the sweater on one of her shoulders. Perhaps Taylor should just find another sweater, ya think?

Joe Dean, walking.

Taylor, posing in various positions in her house, not walking, still troubled.

Brief shot of Joe Dean with his head stuck to a telephone pole. (No idea.)

Finally, after managing to look anguished in every room of her house, Taylor pauses on her staircase long enough to shove her apparently-finished letter into a leather jacket that just happens to be lying on a nearby step. Cut to Joe Dean in a car (where the hell did that come from?), where he gazes at an unrelated jacket, then he hops out and starts walking somewhere again. I really don’t understand this boy.

Taylor sings for a bit, still not properly attired, then we see Joe Dean back in those bleachers. He suddenly pulls out Taylor’s note from one of his coat pockets. He seems to be surprised at finding it (despite having had his hands in his coat pockets throughout most of the video), and even more surprised by what the letter says. Then he jumps up and starts walking somewhere again. Fade to black.

Do the people in this town just not have phones? Sure would save on the aimless wandering and extended time spent wearing sweaters that don’t fit. Just sayin.

Click Here to Watch the Video on YouTube.

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